I never thought I'd...

leave my blog untouched for so long

come off as annoying to anyone (though I think I do, more often than I think I do, but why...? :/)

feel depressed about how I'm perceived as

actually not be able to save money (I had faith, now I'm not so sure...)

ACTUALLY TALK TO SOMEONE FIRST (conversation starting is my weakness, no joke)

be so motivated to lose weight (I thought I'd be able to find someone who loves me for me, but not so much now I guess...)

***

not that I now think I have to become another person, before people will like me more, rather that I need to throw away my fairytale inhibitions and stop thinking of that one guy who will ride to me on maybe a turquoise-haired horse (HAHAHAH TOP)..................

and I know it's been more than like a thousand times I've said I'm gonna work on my health,

(hold on, need to pee)

(ok back)

BUT I REALLY REALLY AM DOING something and am sticking to it

enough of the fat jokes, enough of the loser/ugly jokes, enough of the ridiculous lies and teasing, I'm sick of it all.


not that these are the main reasons, but because, I, myself, in general, dislike fatness.

Right, I mean, if I saw a model and a pluz size model, I obviously would look at the model more.
The hot one. Just cause. That's who I am.

And I know there are people who are okay with and like fat people, and I respect that, I don't disregard that at all, seeing most of these people are my friends hahahahha because they hang out with me... I think?

Ok la enough with the fat talk. I need to go exercise. HAHAHAHAHHAHAH

Oh and proud to say I am now an undergrad. Though I still have to hit 2.5 before I can advance to my major... Shit I need to start studying for real now. In. 2. Days.

Madness.